Lonely Nights

Before we got married, whenever Myke would go on a business trip, I would have separation anxiety a day or two before he leaves. I get really clingy and madrama. But once he leaves, I'd forget about his absence and enjoy singlehood! And just be excited about his return.

Now that we're married, I'm still the same, however there's one slight difference: I start missing Myke when I'm about to go to bed and when I wake up (Ending the day with him makes everything that transpired more meaningful and starting the day with him inspires me to do better.) .

And tonight is one of those nights. Myke's been in Singapore for 3 days now and will be back tomorrow night. I'm having a hard time getting some shut-eye because he's not beside me, and, I'm too excited for his return!

It's gonna be a looonnnggg night....

My First 100 days

I cannot believe how much my life has changed since my wedding day. All good, I must say. So, here I am sharing some of my experiences, adjustments, sentiments as a newly married woman.

Home Sweet Home

• We moved to our new home immediately after the wedding and I still can't get over the fact that our location is near everything -- 15-minute drive to Mandaluyong (Myke's office), 10 minutes to Megamall, Shangri-la, Podium & Galleria, 20 minutes to Quezon City (Gateway), 30 minutes to Makati (and that's because of Makati traffic, otherwise it'll be much faster), 30-45 minutes to Paranaque (my mom's house) and the best one -- 3 minutes to Tiendesitas (it's a 10-minute walk if you want to exercise)! Plus, color coding is not practiced in our part of the metro (I think it's all wrong, but hey, it works for me.).
• It's such a relief that we're not wasting money to rent (I "wasted" money to rent before I got married to live alone. No regrets. 'Twas all worth it. But it's still different to have your own house, knowing that no matter happens, no one can kick you out of it.). At least, the money we put into our house will lead up to us owning it someday soon . And it makes me proud that we are actually buying our own house.
• I grew up having friends over our house all the time. But when I started living on my own years back, I could only have a few people in my little flat. Now, I can have as much friends over, cook a full-course meal and have a party at home!

Lifestyle of a Domestic Diva

• Crossing over from my highly strung life in advertising to a domestic diva/housewife, ain't easy at all. Having so much time in my hands, I had to set a totally new rhythm to my life -- when to clean the house, what time to cook and wake up, when to watch tv (I swear, you can only have so much TV -- and that's coming from a self-confessed TV addict), play PS2, do the groceries, etc. In short, I had to make my own schedule and strictly stick to it, to make sure that I get to do everything or not end up doing nothing at all! I'm still adjusting, but I'm actually enjoying.
• When I lived alone, in Makati, I gave up bringing a car because it was more convenient to commute -- my office was a 5-minute jeepney ride (longer if you take a cab!) and everything else around was walkable, during gimmicks someone's bound to take me home (if no one can, getting a cab would be a breeze). Now, because our place isn't really a "commuter-friendly" area, and Myke is at work all day, I have to drive myself around. I'm not really pleased about it (yes, despite our convenient location) because I have to deal with wreckless drivers, stupid traffic enforcers, traffic and parking (still can't do parallel parking, and no plans of learning, hehe)!
• BREAKFAST. I have to remind myself that there is such a meal! You see, I have stopped having breakfast ages ago. But like most people, it is an important meal for Myke and in the beginning, I always forgot to feed him in the morning!
• And because I prepare his breakfast, I have to wake up early in the morning, too! That's around 6:30am! I never had to wake up this early! Not even when I was working (I'd wake up at 9am for work, mind you.)!
• But here's the fun part, I can go back to sleep once he leaves for work. Hehehe. But, I am now trying not to, while very tempting, because you'll be surprise how sleep can make you gain so much weight!
• Ask me the most convenient place to buy the nicest, most affordable pieces of furniture, house decor, hardware items, food products and I will gladly tell you and even give you a rational for my recommendations.
• From clients, writers, producers and art directors, I now deal with carpenters, plumbers, electricians, painters, household helps, fellow homeowners and kids! And believe me, shifting from corporate linggo to simple tagalog/english linggo is not easy. I sometimes catch myself speaking in english while talking to helpers (especially when I'm irritated) or use the word "hazard" instead of "danger" when talking kids! And I have to put a lid on my gay linggo supply most of the time!

Woman of Leisure

• Since I cook breakfast and dinner for Myke, I spend quite a lot time browsing through the internet and food magazines, watching food network to boost my cooking skills. I even experiment sometimes. I like cooking, but I must say it is more enjoyable and rewarding doing it for someone special (yuck, mushy!) and for family and friends, too!
• As mentioned, I am a self-confessed TV addict, but believe me, one can only have so much of it. So, I have regulated my TV watching and have started (gasp!) reading books more often.
• Being home for most part of the day, it's so easy to just slack off and be a couch potato, but I have acquired the discipline to exercise every afternoon (either by swimming or doing some aerobics) to make sure I keep my tummy flat and avoid being flabby.
• Because I own my schedule, I can easily tag along with Myke in his business trips, drive to Paranaque to spend time with my mom, meet up with friends who have as much free time as I do, do the groceries and household errands during off-peak hours.

Change is Constant

• I never had to share a bed, a room, bathroom and even TV with anyone. Not even when I was a kid. Now I do. I'm learning how not to wake up every time Myke changes his sleeping position, learned how to appreciate his TV shows (otherwise one of us needs to go to the other room to watch, which we sometimes do:)), making sure that I leave the bathroom floor dry after taking a bath (It's been my habit to let myself drip dry and not to towel off...it prolongs my "bagong ligo" feeling.) because Myke hates a wet bathroom floor.
• I am learning to watch TV with the volume turned down, especially when Myke sleeps ahead. Yes, I like my TV LOUD.
• I now need to add soup or a vegetable dish to every meal I cook because Myke prefers it that way. I dont eat veggies and I am now learning to swallow green stuff. I have to learn to cook food that I do not eat.
• Every decision I make, now has to be consulted with my hubby. Not to ask permission, but to make sure that whatever effect my decision will be, will be fine with him.
• I don't go out as often as I used to. I prefer to be home when my hubby gets home. When I do go out, I don't stay out as late as I used to because I want my hubby awake when I get home.

Go, Grow, Glow

• I am very grateful with all this time I have because I get to practice photography/take more photos, write more often.
• Aside from improving my cooking skills, I have also improved my interior decorating skill, discovered that I have a knack for designing furniture.
• I am now taking steps in realizing my dream to be a pre-school teacher (I'll blog about this separately).

As I look back on how my life has been, how I imagined my future will be, I realized, THAT FUTURE IS HERE! I am living the life I wished for. And I cannot be thankful enough.

Now, I am making a new future with my hubby and a life for our future kids and I can only hope that we will have the future that we picture for ourselves as a married couple and likewise help our kids have the life they imagine for themselves.

Ahhh...life is great!

Privileged

I recently went to my (former) office to get my last pay, and I guess it's inevitable that people will ask "ano, babalik ka na?" (of course after they ask "buntis ka na?"). To which I quickly reply "of course, not", "no way", "hinde, noh".

But at the back of my mind, I'm afraid (okay, concerned...no worried is the word) people might think of me as a loser for not having a job/career anymore. Of course, that's coupled my very humbling experience of not earning my own keep (you have to understand, I have been living independently for many years). That being a domestic diva/housewife is nothing to be proud of.

Much to my surprise, people envy my position! They said, "wow, sarap naman!", "kakainggit!", "swerte mo naman"...

Yeah, I really am lucky to be in the position I am now. I realize that in this day and age of dual-income families, it is indeed a privilege to have a CHOICE of being in the corporate world or stay at home to take care of things that matter most, while pursuing your dreams and still live a comfortable life.

Of course, I'm still pursuing my dream of being a pre-school teacher (but that's another story, which I will blog about soon).

Passing

The sudden death of my Dad 10 years ago came as a shock. 4 years after, we lost an uncle to cancer, but we had 10 months to "prepare" before he finally crossed over, but the pain was still as immeasurable as that of my Dad's passing.

A week ago, my grand father passed away. He died of old age. He was 93. He wasn't sick or anything, he literally just stopped breathing. Despite seeing life slip him by little by little everyday (okay, every week -- i visit every weekend), and we were sort of expecting that he will go anytime, still, when the time came, the same pain was still there.

I guess one cannot really be prepared to face the pain the is brought by the death of a loved one. One can only be consoled by the comfort and kind words extended by family, relatives and friends during this time of grief and mourning.

So, as I said in my eulogy, thank you to everyone who extended their support to our family, I'm sure my Daddy Wowo is equally grateful.