What's Your Position?

I've been feeling down and a bit depressed this past few days because of the events happening around me.

*A good friend (mother of a godchild) is on the verge of a marital separation and while she's trying to settle things with her spouse, she and her kids are staying with us. I've taken on the role of (sort of) a second mom to her kids while she's at work. Lending a listening ear to my friend as she shares the latest status of her state.

*An aunt just underwent a triple bypass surgery (Thank God, a successful one), but the family is still trying to raise enough amount to pay for the procedure in full. Meanwhile, I've been helping out in sourcing the funds they need on top of trying to talk my cousins and uncle out of their misery.

*A good friend's dad - who's also close to my heart, who's been in the hospital for the past months for various medical treatments, passed away this morning. I know for a fact that there's no easy way to comfort anyone who's loved one just passed away, but I am trying my darn best to let my friend know that I am close by.

I am not complaining. I just can't help but feel for these people who are very dear to me. As I was sharing how I feel with my husband last night, he told me something -something that hit me. It hit me alright, but I don't know in what way, it just did. He said: "Just be thankful that you're in the position to help out."

Yes, we are very blessed that we can help out - financially, emotionally. No, I don't want to be in any position but here. Still, it breaks my heart to see them this way. I hope and pray that everything will fall into place, God's will be done, and see these people I love smiling again.

My Lakbayan Grade: Pathetic.

My Lakbayan grade is C!

How much of the Philippines have you visited? Find out at Lakbayan!

Created by Eugene Villar.

I don't know the creator's basis for the grades that appear in the results of the survey, but I really thought I was going to get a higher grade! Really. Yes, I try to visit a new place as often as I could (at least once a year). I realize now that I've visited quite a few places, once too often not realizing that there are other places to explore! Geesh.

I really hope I can improve my grade. Soon.

"Happy Mother's Day!"

I received my first round of greetings last month. Now, before you get excited, I'm not pregnant. I received the greetings from parents of my students last year. "Being a teacher, you stand as the second mom to your students. So, happy mother's day, too!"

Hmm? I felt good to be appreciated for the job I do. And the same time, it got me thinking when will I start to receive greetings because I really am a mother already.

In a previous blog, I mentioned that, for me, parenthood is something you (and your spouse)really prepare for. Most people assumed that when I started teaching, I would get all excited about having my own kids. On the contrary, while IT IS fun being around them, I got to see the other side of that. I found how difficult it can get to discipline them, how physically exhausting it is being with them, how great a responsibility is it to make sure you impart proper values to them, how your patience can be tested, etc. I get a sneak peak into parenting for a couple of hours and it's no joke! I always tell people that I love my job so much, and I love my kids a lot, but I am just thankful that, at the end of the day, I can return them to their parents.

For the past months, my husband and I have been seriously talking about adding a new member to our household. Yes, we know we can afford it, we know we want it, but somehow talking about it gives us the jitters. Somehow, there was always something that made us take a step back and ask, "Are we really ready?".

Aside from the fact that I am not getting any younger, and that I want to grow up with my kids too, I've been thinking if I'm ready to give up my "freedom". Freedom to do what I want at a whim, freedom to pack up and travel to wherever, freedom to just be lazy and not do anything, freedom to go and stay out, freedom to act like a single person without a care in the world.

That's pretty much how our married life has been and bringing in a little one into such a lifestyle won't be easy.

And so, we've been praying and praying and praying about it and somehow "Happy Mother's Day!" is now music to my ears.

I guess the production process begins here. ;)