It's been an insanely busy month. No, months.  Organized a family reunion (one year in the making) of 50plus relatives coming from different parts of the globe.  It's was quite stressful (nothing compared to organizing a company outing!), but the success of the event and the bonding time we all had was all worth it.

The last of the mohi-clan flew out last Friday and suddenly it's so quiet.  I miss them all.  Sigh.

Life is slowly going back to regular programming...

It's the kapitan's year-end program soon! Can't believe he has finished  a school year already!  So many changes has happened and many more to come....

Resolutions

Yeah, yeah, it's that time of year when people make resolutions that they will eventually break. Haha! I believe, whether you keep one or none of what you have in your list, having resolutions make you feel you are off to a fresh start, nonetheless.

I've never gotten the habit of literally making a list.  It's just a mental list of around 3 things I plan (or hope!) in the coming months.

I declare this year to be my ME YEAR.  A year to put more focus on myself and what I want to do (the past 2 years have been all about the kapitan and everything else have been taken a backseat - no regrets, but it's time to move forward):

*I resolve to be fit (aka keep the pounds away and build stamina to keep up with a growing toddler).  I am proud to say that I've had a head start and started going to the gym regularly beginning last quarter of last year.

*I want to learn something new this year.  Still figuring out what that would be --- an new language, a sport, a skill.  Whatever it is, I am looking forward to it.

*I will feed my soul again and revive my passion for teaching.  I don't know how, but I will.  I have some ideas already. :)

There you go.  I hope to look back to this post and be able to say 2 out of 3 is not bad. :)

Happy 2011!

Oh and I hope to start taking baby steps in being able to travel with my hubby again, without the kapitan in tow.  Kahit sa Tagaytay lang. Haha!

Cord Banking

Should you or shouldn't you?

I was interviewed about cord blood banking and was asked why we did it and would we recommend it.  I said, if you can afford it, go for it.  Look at it as a life insurance --- something you wish you will never need but something you hope you have in case you need it.  

It's an investment we decided to make.  Now more than ever, I am glad that we made that decision.  My 6month old niece will undergo a heart surgery and she has a VERY rare blood type.  We have tapped all our resources for blood donors but found just one.  In fact, her blood type is so rare in the Philippines that she's even lucky to get one donor.  

I do not wish that my son will go through a similar ordeal, but I am thankful that if he does (or even us, his parents) we only have to call our blood bank.   

Anyway, please pray for a successful procedure and speedy recovery of my niece.  I believe it's a blessing that her heart surgery is scheduled on the feast of the Immaculate Heart of Mary. :)

Reminder to Self

A few weeks back, Tiago was sick. It was a viral (as usual) infection than manifested as high fever. It was nothing to worry about, our pedia said. I wasn't.

I was complaining a lot, though. Complaining that all my plans for the week were cancelled because I had to stay home. Complaining that I couldn't work because I had to be beside my son. Complaining that I was feeding all night long. Etc., etc.

Then I sneaked in some time to log-in on Facebook and saw a few status lines saying they'd rather be home to be with their child - sick or otherwise.

I wanted to whack myself on the head and ask myself what was I complaining about. I have it good! More than good, for that matter. I get paid to work from home, even if I'm not teaching now, I still get to be involved in school activities, bring my son to his classes and playdates, be with my son at home, occasionally have lunch with friends, etc., etc.

I should really be saying gratitude more than complaints.

Yeah, my life is great. Thank You, Lord. :)

Consumed by Motherhood

Oh my. Nagdilang anghel yata ako. Two blog posts back, I mentioned my son's first birthday will just sneak up on me. Well, didn't really sneak up on me, but it's already lurking around the corner. Imagine that.

It's been almost 6 months since my last post. To be honest, blogging has been the last thing on my mind. It's unbelievable how busy being a mother can get. Especially if you're crazy like me insisting on not having a yaya. It's insane. Time has never passed by this fast -- not even during my advertising days!

Everyone's right. This is indeed a crazy ride but I am not complaining. Okay, okay. Sometimes, I am. I mean, how can you have a heart so soft and tough at the same time? Or be both on-guard yet oh so vulnerable?

However, cliche as it may sound, it's really the most enjoyable and fulfilling role I've ever had. Words cannot even begin to describe how a mother beams with so much pride over each and every milestone of her child (No, I am not going to enumerate my son's loooong - hehe - list.). It is also the toughest role ever. Yet, I love it, with every bit of my being.

My son is asleep already as I write this. And I am waiting for my husband to come home. This is probably just some pahabol post partum blues, but am glad I had this rare moment alone to proudly write about what's keeping me busy nowadays.

Half-y Birthday, Tiago!

We never really celebrate Tiago's monthly mark. However, we decided to make his 6th month a little special. He is, after all, half a year old. So, we had a half round cake made with HAPPY 1/2 BIRTHDAY, TIAGO written on it. Hahaha. Trip lang. But cute, right?

So, to our little Kapitan, Half-y Birthday! 6 more months and you're already a year old!

A New Year To Look Forward To

Since I gave birth, I always looked forward to new milestones (smilestone according to Nestle :)) of my little Kapitan. Greeting 2009 made me realize that I have a whole year watch out for all these milestones, which includes his first birthday! Geesh, ang bilis talaga ng panahon!

Anyway, I hope you all had a meaningful Christmas celebration and wishing you a new year full of love, laughter and adventure!

Officially in my mid-30s

I've been telling family and friends that even birthdays take on a different meaning once you become a parent. At first, I couldn't explain why or how. After some pondering, I now know.

Not that my previous ones were less meaningful, it's just that now it's become more about my son and my husband -- a family I can call my own, rather than just myself.

More than the presents, the food and well-wishes, waking up to this was the best part of my birthday:


Credit goes to my wonderful husband who thoughtfully orchestrated the whole thing :).

Officially Parents

Presenting our baby boy....


Name: Santiago Manuel Macalino-Santos
Born on: July 14, 2008
Time: 11:43am
Where: The Medical City
Weight: 5lbs 12oz
Length: 49cm
Type of Delivery: C-Section

No words can fully describe the overwhelming happiness we feel with this latest blessing in our life.

Now, let the wild and crazy and fun ride begin...

The Waiting Game

During my last check-up, my OB said, "Well, all we have to do now is wait." She went on saying that this is actually the "longest" stage of pregnancy. She's right.

I have been going crazy trying to find things to do around the house just to keep myself busy -- cook (despite the unbearable heat), fix the nursery (there isn't really much to fix anymore, aside from a few more stuff, the only thing missing now is the baby :)), created a blog for our baby boy (sorry, it's by invitation only. leave me a message and your email address if you wish to view it. i must say, it's pretty cute!), reading up on labor, delivery, parenting & breastfeeding, print pictures and put them in an album, change the photos displayed in our place, etc., etc. I have even started packing my hospital bag with still a month of waiting to go! I even told a fellow pregnant friend/childbirth class classmate, that I might just start repainting our place any moment now.

You see, I have been on leave since May. After teaching summer class last April, the next class for me would be this June (the opening of the next school year), which obviously I can't do anymore. Imagine how much time I have but with very limited options of what I can do!

Ironically, it being Independence Day today, I find myself listing things that I miss doing (read: things I can't do or avoid doing) and SO long to do once the baby arrives (I wish.).

*I miss sleeping on my back and tummy. Heck, I miss having a good night's sleep!
*I miss travelling.
*I miss going on long weekend getaways.
*I miss going to school -- teaching and being with my kids and co-teacher.
*I miss eating oysters!!!
*I miss eating street food -- fish balls, squid balls, isaw, balut, etc.
*I miss drinking coffee!!! (Decaf isn't the same)
*I miss wearing my pre-pregnancy clothes -- especially my jeans!
*I miss wearing sneakers and closed shoes.
*I miss getting a massage (the real deal! not those meant for pregnant women.).
*I miss wearing my contact lenses (eyeglasses are just inconvenient).
*I miss (gasp!) driving!
*I miss swimming.
*I miss watching a movie without having to go on a bathroom break.
*I miss going to the beach!
*I miss having a flat tummy (uh. duh!).
*I miss talking walks without having to deal with sore feet and an aching back.
*I miss gorging on junkfood.
*I miss my occasional cigarette puffs.
*I miss playing Wii Sports!
*I miss feeling cool and breezy (summer and pregnancy just don't go together!).
*I miss watching concerts.

Sigh. I'm sure I can still add a lot more to this list. The good thing about thinking about this is that it takes my mind away from the anxiety of giving birth. Haha!

Short and Sweet and Sentimental

Every year for the past...who knows how many years, I've always wondered when Julia Fordham would hold a concert again in the country. I miss being swept away in romance land as she sings her song. I have watched all her past concerts, including those performances in hotels and I never got tired of it, despite the fact that she sings the same songs each time. Admittedly, I acquired my addiction to this diva from an ex, however, I have always liked her songs. So, I have been wishing to see her back on stage again.

My wish finally came true last Sunday. Had the privilege to watch her up close (Front seat!Thanks, TZ!) in Glorietta. It was a short one hour performance (which is fine with me because that's how long I can manage to stay seated without feeling uncomfortable), yet, Julia, again, did not disappoint. Never mind that it was not promoted with much fanfare, and that it was held in a public place, as always, she delivered a performance that will make you fall in love with the feeling of being in love! This I know because I watched her past concerts with different dates (fine, exes) and always ended up reeling from the same effect (Heck, I don't think it would matter if I watched it with a girlfriend.)!

And so, to end this post (and fine, because it is Valentine's Day), to quote a line from Julia's song, this goes to the man I am definitely in love with -- "I must have done something right, to be here loving you." I love you, sweetie!

Happy Heart's Day, Everyone! (Okay, I'm not really a believer of this day, so this is as far as I would go.)

Extended Jetlag

I know, I know, it's been a looong while.

A couple of weeks after my last post, my hubby and I left for our annual sojourn (Pictures to be posted soon. Hopefully.) However, that's not the sole reason for the silence in this journal.

What I thought was just fatigue and terrible jetlag from the trip -- lots of sightseeing, touring, seeing friends, getting on and off airplanes, waiting in airports, adjusting to different timezones was, apparently, much more than just that.

I was, good gahd, 5 weeks pregnant! No wonder I was chronically tired the week before we flew back home. Again, I just dismissed it as fatigue.

Yes, yes, we should consider this trip as our honeymoon. Hey, but that's not the point here.

I'm on my 13th week now, and it has not been easy. I call my pregnancy a textbook pregnancy. Everything the book says one might be experiencing has been happening to me! I always tell my friends I should get a prize for getting a perfect score!

Honestly, this the the most awful feeling ever. I call myself a "senior citizen". I can hardly get out of bed, can't eat anything, I feel woozy and nauseous all the time, my tummy, back, head, aches...name it! I haven't been to school since the Christmas break, haven't been able to cook, drive, clean the house, anything! I think a senior citizen is more able and capable than I am now.

That is why I haven't been online. I couldn't afford to take a few steps to go to the den and go to my desktop computer let alone sit on a chair and spend a few minutes in front of the computer. So, I finally got myself a laptop and installed a wi-fi router in our house. Now, I can go online in the comfort of my bed, and hopefully, update you with this latest adventure of my life.

Gastronomic Birthday

My birthday this year's on a Friday. We were going to be in Bangkok for the weekend (with my family), so, I didn't plan nor accept any birthday get-togethers. I must admit, the announcement of my birthday being a holiday (end of Ramadan) was anti-climactic. I had really wanted to spend that morning in school with my students, have the afternoon all to myself and leave the evening for my hubby to plan. Since it was going to be a holiday, I had a whole day of nothing planned. Little did I know that Hubby was onto something. Well, I knew something was up, and I was desperately trying to get him to spill the beans (he's bad at keeping secrets, you know), but (clap! clap! clap!), he was able to contain himself until the end of the day.

My birthday turned out to be a day of friends popping-up for breakfast, lunch, merienda and dinner! Needless to say, my tummy was filled to the rim that I could hardly move by the time we were done with dinner. Nevertheless, I had a wonderful birthday -- with friends and family around, what more could I ask for?

Here are snapshots of my gastronomic birthday celebration:

Dinner at Cantinetta (the night before my birthday) with my sis-in-law. She brought the uber dense chocolate cake from Banapple (I still have some if you like).

McDonald's breakfast (with 2 bags puto & kutsinta) at home with Myke's barkada (who are, obviously my friends, too). Naka pantulog pa'ko nyan!

Lunch at Secret Recipe with ex-Client, now super good friend, Olivia. Finally got to taste their famous super spicy Tom Yum noodle soup.

Merienda at Via Mare with my best friend, her family and our barkada Rene (Berns & Gats, I'll just see you guys in NYC!). Had Bibingka, Arroz Caldo, Tokwa't Baboy, among other things.

Dinner at La Cucina de Tita Moning with my First Wives Club Kuyug friends. Really good & sumptuous meal! From soup to dessert, yum-my!

Thank you to my hubby for a wonderful birthday. Mwah!

Pictures and story of my Birthday Weekend in Bangkok here.

What's Your Position?

I've been feeling down and a bit depressed this past few days because of the events happening around me.

*A good friend (mother of a godchild) is on the verge of a marital separation and while she's trying to settle things with her spouse, she and her kids are staying with us. I've taken on the role of (sort of) a second mom to her kids while she's at work. Lending a listening ear to my friend as she shares the latest status of her state.

*An aunt just underwent a triple bypass surgery (Thank God, a successful one), but the family is still trying to raise enough amount to pay for the procedure in full. Meanwhile, I've been helping out in sourcing the funds they need on top of trying to talk my cousins and uncle out of their misery.

*A good friend's dad - who's also close to my heart, who's been in the hospital for the past months for various medical treatments, passed away this morning. I know for a fact that there's no easy way to comfort anyone who's loved one just passed away, but I am trying my darn best to let my friend know that I am close by.

I am not complaining. I just can't help but feel for these people who are very dear to me. As I was sharing how I feel with my husband last night, he told me something -something that hit me. It hit me alright, but I don't know in what way, it just did. He said: "Just be thankful that you're in the position to help out."

Yes, we are very blessed that we can help out - financially, emotionally. No, I don't want to be in any position but here. Still, it breaks my heart to see them this way. I hope and pray that everything will fall into place, God's will be done, and see these people I love smiling again.

Been there. Done that. Now what?

If you're in the Sales/Marketing/Advertising industry, you would know that you need to have at least a 3-year plan laid out for your brand/product. If you don't, as sure as the sun will rise, your brand/product will not survive the highly competitive world out there. At best, it'll be just a flash in the pan.

I have looked at my life as a "brand" -- having short and long term goals to work on. Timelines included. I knew what I wanted to do with my life and have taken the necessary steps to achieve my goals. Luckily, I am so blessed (note to self: blog about this next) to be living the life that I envisioned for myself.

Someone recently asked me this rhetorical question: "Our present and future seem to be looking good, no?" (Something to that effect). That got me thinking. Yes, my present is very much the way I want it to be. Can't ask for anything more.

What about my future?

As far back as I can remember, the journey of my life has always been towards one goal -- be a preschool teacher. Now that I am one (and I cannot thank God enough for this), I seem to be in a state of limbo. After so many years, I suddenly do not have a goal to work on. I am living my life each day as it comes.

I guess, just like any brand/product that hits the number one slot and is very confident in keeping that position, I too am very content with where I am now. But as any good brand manager would ask, how do you evolve from here?

The answer to that question, is my prayer. I guess until I get my answer I will stay happy and content with where I am and what I have.

And I don't think there is anything wrong with that. :)

Break of Dawn

It's 4:34 a.m. The cabin lights are out. It's pitch dark. My eyesight, hazy. All I could see is the green lighted sign to the lavatory. I pull up my window shade, my eyes start to focus and I see the most beautiful sunrise I have ever seen. Hues of blue, orange and yellow, splashed across what seems like dark canvass. I am in awe. The movie "What Dreams May Come" comes to mind then a strong, strong feeling of God's presence surrounds me and a feeling of happiness overwhelmes me. Still in awe, I manage to (silently) utter "Thank you, God."

I know what I captured through my humble point-and-shoot camera doesn't give justice to what I saw but I hope I could share with you even just a tiny bit of what I felt when I saw this beautiful sight.

There Goes My Weekend

You know that I always try to keep my weekends sacred (something I learned from my parents) -- time to give your full attention to your family.

This weekend is one of those rare times that I have to sacrifice my weekend. I'm working overtime/double time to finish my tasks for our graduation and year-end party. Although I'm at home, still, I'm working.

Anyway, I'm taking a break now and decided to blog about a pleasant experience I had last weekend.

I went to a university to inquire about the requirements I need to take up a masteral course. So I went inside the office and asked for the requirements and, if possible, the schedule for the first semester of the next school year. The lady stared at me, clarified what I needed and asked some other questions that didn't quite make sense to me. Thinking, maybe she didn't understand me I repeated myself (in tagalog this time):

"Miss, hihingi po sana ako ng requirements para makapag masters ako"

And she replied:

"Ahhh, akala ko undergrad ka eh..."

Then she gave me the list.

That's all. (*wink*wink*)

Gotta go back to work and hopefully, I get to join my brothers and my husband in watching a movie tonight.

Making Birthdays Special

My birthday is definitely my favorite day of the year! I get to be a star (in my own right!) for a day. I make sure that it is going to be a special day. That is why I make it a point to celebrate it people who matter. No, not to collect gifts, but to be with those who make me look forward to another year because I know they will be around to share my life's highs and lows with the laughter, comfort and appreciation they bring.

Okay, okay. Gifts ARE welcome, too! Hehe. Admit it or not, receiving gifts makes birthdays special too! Especially gifts like this picture book my wonderful hubby created:

Doesn't that give you a lump in the throat, bring you to tears and make your heart feel like exploding because of so much happiness? It's priceless.

I just love celebrating my birthday.

Keeping the Memories

This was supposed to be posted for Father's Day but I was bed-ridden (I'll blog about this next), so here it is:

You know the cliche, "Out of sight, out of mind"? We use this a lot in the advertising world to convince Client that if they don't make their presence felt with their consumers, their product, no matter how great, will be forgotten.

I guess the same thing goes for people in our lives.

While doing the groceries in Pioneer Center, a very unlikely place for me to bump into someone, I came across this guy, around 60 years old, salt and pepper hair, that looked so familiar. Now, why would a guy that age be a familiar face. I scanned through my memory bank -- an ex Client? dad of an old friend? an ex officemate? a board member of some company i had a shoot with? an ex boyfriend (joke!)? I got nothing.

As our shopping carts crossed, I couldn't stop staring at him and I noticed that he stared back too! I figured, I probably looked familiar to him as well. But I still couldn't place where and how I know him. We passed each other and I had the urge to look back for another look at him. I looked back and so did he!

And like a lightning bolt, it hit me. He was an officemate and a good friend of my Dad. No wonder he looked so familiar! He'd been my Dad's right hand man since I was a baby! So, I finally found the words say: "Uhm, did you used to work for (my Dad's company)?" And he says: "Yes, a long time ago." And I introduced myself as the daughter of EdMac (yes, that's how we are all called -- Macs). His eyes lit up and hugged me tight and blurted out "Anne!".

We started exchanging our "how are yous" and quick updates about my mom and brothers. He said that it'd been such a long time and then asked: "How long has it been (since my Dad passed away)?" I said: "10 years." After we said our goodbyes, that's when it hit me so hard.

It's been 10 long years since my Dad passed away. I realized, that I had moved on...moved on so much that I do not remember him as much anymore. Memories of him do not cross my mind as often as it used to. Heck, I didn't even remember to go visit him on his death anniversary!

It's breaking my heart to realize that he's REALLY not part of my life anymore. Memories of him are moving into that hard to reach corner of my mind that, believe it or not, I sometimes have difficulty trying to picture his face! I have even forgotten that I keep a picture of him in my wallet. I have stopped including him in my stories and daily conversations (My friends used to think I'm crazy (jokingly) when I'd tell them that I need to ask permission from my Dad to go out of town :-)).

So today, as my father's day gift to him, I promise to talk about him, talk to him, include him in my prayers, visit him and just remember him more often. Dad, I'm so sorry that I don't think of you as often anymore. But I know, you know how much I love you and that you're always by my side.

Happy Father's Day to my hero, and the greatest father I know -- MY DAD.

***

On a separate note, this was the first father's day that I didn't celebrate. My Dad's in heaven, the only living grandfather I had passed away last February, my father-in-law is out of the country and my husband ain't a father yet. Kinda felt weird not to have celebrated this day. Sigh. Oh but then again, I was sick, so I wouldn't have been able to anyway. Ah well, I hope you all had a wonderful time with your own fathers and cherish them while they're still around.

Next question, please!

Attended a baptism last Sunday and got to see former officemates who ALL asked me, "Ikaw, kelan ka (mag-b-baby)?" or "May laman na ba (referring to my tummy)?" (Years before that was "When are you getting married?", and before that, "Do you have a boyfriend?" or "Why are you still single?", and so on. You get the picture.)

And when I answer "No, none yet." or "Maybe next year." People are quick to react, "Why? Dapat ngayon na! How old are you? O, you're not getting any younger!" (Sometimes I get slightly upset and tell them off by saying, "if you want one so bad, then go make one!")

Do people ask these questions for small talk? Heck, whatever happened to "How are you? Or the weather?" Are they just curious? Curiosity can sometimes, really, kill the cat. I mean, what if you touch a sensitive nerve with those questions? Like when she wants to have a baby but can't have one. Or is it the next logical thing to ask?

I know, I know that once one is married, logically a baby will follow. But the timing depends on when the couple feels that they are ready to have one. And that, I believe needs to be respected.

Every decision, every move I have made in my life was carefully thoughtout, weighed and followed a critical path schedule (give or take a few delays and advances) -- which university to go to, what course to take, when to have a boyfriend, whether/when to break-up/reconcile with one, what career to pursue, when to live on my own, when to enjoy singleblessedness, when to move jobs, when to get married -- all done with calculations I deemed best for me (yes, even my spur-of-the-moment moves).

That is why I've never had regrets in my life. And I definitely do not want to regret the arrival of my own child.

Therefore, the same process goes with having a baby. Proper timing is key. (of course, God still has the final say, but we do what we can to follow the timing we want.) For reasons my husband and I share.

What I always tell my friends who ask me the same questions above, it's similar to having guests at home. When you have unexpected ones, you don't turn them away, you're glad that they're there, but you get stressed thinking of what to serve them, quickly fixing the house, fixing yourself to look presentable, running around like a headless chicken before you can attend to them properly. But when you are expecting them, you carefully plan what to put on the dining table, prepare the house and yourself ahead of time so that we they arrive, you can relax, sit down and spend time with them.

And until that time comes, I (together with my husband) will continue to prepare myself and our home for our future child. So, quit it with the questions and just be pleasantly surprised with the events that will unfold. (Besides, I've only been married for 5 months! I'm still adjusting and enjoying my new role as a wife!)